Star Wars: Return of the Jedi
directed by Richard Marquand

What if an alien in the future stumbled upon Star Wars? Welcome to Earthling Cinema, where we examine the last remaining artifacts of a once-proud culture and try to understand what human lives were like before their planet was destroyed. I’m your host, Garyx Wormuloid.

Star Wars: Episode VI – Return of the Jedi (1983)
Starring: Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher
Directed by: Richard Marquand
Lucasfilm

Written by: Ben Steiner
Analysis & Directed by: Jared Bauer
Starring: Mark Schroeder (https://twitter.com/mark_schroeder)
Edited by: Ryan Hailey
Original Music by: David Krystal (http://www.davidkrystalmusic.com)
Opening Animation by: Danny Rapaport
Producer & Additional Artwork by: Jacob S. Salamon

Star Wars: Return of the Jedi’s Hidden Meaning – Earthling Cinema

Greetings, and welcome to Earthling Cinema. I am your host, Garyx Wormuloid. This weeks artifact is Star Wars 6: Return of the Jedi, fondly remembered as the one that killed the franchise for sixteen years.

The film centers on Luke and his buddies, who are still trying to juggle work and family in the big city. Leia breaks into a giant slugs house and melts Han back into human form. Unfortunately she gets captured and sentenced to objectification . Luke arrives and gets himself captured too, but they dont have a bikini in his size, so the slug decides to throw his big mouth into a big mouth. A fight ensues, and fan favorite Boba Fett is given the honorable sendoff he deserves . After Leia puts some salt on that slug , its time for them to get the story rolling.

Luke goes back to visit Yoda to apologize for missing his birthday, but Yoda doesnt take it well . With his last words, Yoda struggles to tell Luke that theres another Skywalker, a gesture made completely irrelevant when Obi-Wans ghost confirms that information in greater detail. He says that the other Skywalker is a girl, which somehow causes Luke to make the insane leap that hes talking about Leia. Which apparently he is, since Leia is the only girl in the galaxy.

The good guys find out that the bad guys are reusing the plot from Episode 4 , so they hatch a plan to also do the same thing they did last time . But first they have to take down a shield thing in a forest. There they meet a bunch of build-a-bears and have a quick pod-race . Luke tells Leia about the whole twin situation, which she says she knew all along . Yep, never a doubt in her mind.

Luke surrenders to Vader, who takes him to his supervisor, the Grand Wizard. The Wizard informs him that the new Death Star is fully operational and the good guys are are about to get hosed big time , and Luke gets mad and cuts off Vaders hand for synchronicitys sake . The Wizard says to kill Darth Vader, which is like damn, dude, bros before foes. And Darth Vader, you gonna let him do you like that? Not even a word of objection?

Fortunately, Luke still puts dads before cads, and politely gives the Wizard his two weeks notice . Whats a new thing they can throw in there? Ok sure, how about lightning? After two whole minutes of silently watching his own flesh and blood get tortured, Vader fulfills the American dream by throwing his boss over the railing, something that a supremely powerful being who can manipulate objects with his mind is powerless to stop. Luke takes off Vaders mask and Vader dies of sun exposure.

Meanwhile, the teddy bears snuggle some chumps to death and the good guys lower the shield, allowing the mayor of Cloud City to fly into the Death Star and blow it up real nice. Then they all stay and party on the forest planet, a place to which they have no connection, rather than going back home. Its not like they have families or anything. Speaking of family, Leia intentionally makes Han think that shes dumping him for Luke just to be an asshole, and Luke burns his fathers body at a haunted house .

Like its predecessors, Return of the Jedi contrasts the Empires cold reliance on technology with the more humanistic nature of the rebellion and its allies, the bears [Ewoks]. The empire looks to satisfy their destructive ambitions with technology, like this robot chicken [two-legged Endor tank things] and this harmonica [Vader without his mask]. Conversely, the bears live a simple existence off the land. They just want to chill out, relax, and savor the taste of human flesh . And while the Rebellion is racially and genderically diverse, the Empire consists entirely of human dude-bros who want everyone to see how big their balls are .

The lush forest planet Endor is based on the Earth jungles of Vietnam during Vietnam War 1. Like the Viet Cong, the bear-people menace their more technologically advanced and well-funded invaders with cunning and primitive booby traps.

But try as they might, the Rebellion cant win with boobies alone . Instead of matching technology with technology, they opt to squeeze all the juice they can out of Vaders compassion fruit. In other words, sending an unemployed guy in his early twenties to convince his estranged father to quit his lucrative job. Obi-wan says its never gonna work .

Twisted and Evilî], but Luke doesnt know the meaning of the words ìnever gonna,î since hes an idiot . However, once Vader sees that Luke is ìnever gonnaî give him up or let him down, he chooses to run around and desert his old principles , proving that self-sacrifice is the most human thing there is. Was. Same difference.

This transition from machine to man can also be heard in the films music, provided one doesnt watch on mute. The menacing and mechanical ìVaderî theme shifts in tempo, rhythm, and instrumentation to become light and organic at the moment of father-son reconciliation . This ties into Earth musician Richard Wagners concept of the leitmotif, or a recurring musical phrase that is associated with a theme, such as the Force , or a character, such as Leia , or an idea, such as mortality . The concept of the heavymotif wasnt understood until decades later, when humans finally discovered the brown note.

For Earthling Cinema, Im Garyx Wormuloid. Goodbye.

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